Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Holy Matrimony!!! Part 2

मम्मी सब रो क्यों रहे हैं....

In the midst of all the crying a 3 year boy asked the mother. The mother who was giving a hug to the bride looks at the kid thinking, "you couldn't have found a better moment to embarrass me". The bride who had imagined and practiced (a little) about this day for a long time looks at the boy as if expecting lasers to come out of her eyes. Looking at the bride (make up half off due to crying) staring at him, the boy starts crying.

Lets rewind a bit though...

In Holy Matrimony!!! Part 1 we had found that the deal between the lessee (the Bride's side) and the lessor (the Groom's side) had been finalized and the mutual agreement was sealed by the engagement ceremony and thus after a series of interviews and some serious negotiations came the wedding day…

Here is the part after the बारात (the groom's side) arrives...

Now our knight in shining armor (all prepared for the battle which is going to last a life time) having a bright smile (still unaware of the fact that he cannot win it, no matter what) is welcomed in. Everyone looks at the Groom in a way like when you are in a market and shopping for your bathroom and you think "will this commode go with my washbasin?."

The bride and the groom are made to sit in those king-queen style chairs which is followed by a big photo session where every Tom, Dick and Harry present has his/her picture taken with them. Actually I sort of like this part cause no matter where you from and no matter what you do, everyone joins in the fun. Now, that the photos have been taken most of the guests move to the most important part- the food and soon after they leave.

After this with only the close relatives left we enter into the part where the bride and the groom roam around the fire in circles (Its known as Pheyraes in Hindi). This usually happens really late in the night so I miss most of it cause my beauty (not exactly) sleep is very important to me, I just cannot do without it. Well we are back to the morning and the girl now is ready to leave to her husbands place...

In the widaai (girl leaving for her husbands place) everyone and I mean EVERYONE cries, even if you really don't feel like crying or you think, "whats up with the crying man?" well doesn't matter you have to cry because that is how its suppose to be.

And some where in between all this the "Gifts" (remember we can't use the D word) are also exchanged.

Now just think for a minute. If you are a bride or a groom. You have to have a smile and take pictures with everyone no matter how hungry or bored or uncomfortable you are (you can't even go to the loo). You get to eat the remains of the food as you are the last ones to eat and you have to be awake the whole night. Still wedding night is suppose to be the best night of your life???

Disclaimer: This account is from my experiences. India is such a vivid place that the traditions and the ceremonies differ from place to place. I totally respect all of them.

15 comments:

Vyazz said...

You have summed up the marriage scene in India sooo well...and its pretty funny too.Read ur other posts too...quite delightful!!
Can u imagine in a few years we'll be in the same predicament!!...Freaky!!!

whiteopal said...

"made to sit in those king-queen style chairs" lol.
"will this commode go with my washbasin?" Rofl
Funny eh...the order in which the rituals take place is different all over India eg. the saat pheras happens in the morning in Marathi weddings, and then reception at night. But the 'gifts','king-queen chairs',barat, all are the same. One wonders how these things evolved...

Kaddu said...

Oh! You just strengthened my resolve of having only a registrar marriage & not a traditional one! Shit! The worst part is carrying that heavy lehenga around... n the groom's family forcing the wrong size of bangles on your wrist... n ear rings having such thick pins they can't go through the tiny piercings in your ear lobes! Oh and not o forget being stuffed up with sweets 'coz none of your so-called frineds & relatives want to miss on the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity of torturing you! And before the actual wedding... the ceremony where they put dahi, besan & god-knows-wht-other-crap on your body! Disgusting! And after all this physical & mental agony, they actually have the nerve to dig you about your "first night" next morning! As if you would have any strength left to have a "first-night"!

Mukund said...

Vyazz: thanks for the appreciation I hope I can keep up the good work ;)... It will be damn funny when I get married... I don't how I will manage to stay awake the whole night.. btw since you are new here I am really lazy and love to sleep

Mukund said...

White: The rituals are similar everywhere with certain differences... Come to think of it really can't think of the point where all this might have started but You certainly wish things would be simple...

Mukund said...

Kaddu: You seem to be all ready and excited for your wedding. Yup its a big pain alright I mean people should get married in jeans and Ts right.. :)
That is why I guess a huge percentage of people sleep on their first nights (coutsey: Salman Khan in 10 ka Dum)... ;)

rae said...

LOL @ the crying kid part! I could picture it in my head Mukund.

Now I know why I didn't see the walking around the fire part. I was a foreigner (guest) and not close relatives, and I probably was in my beauty sleep when they did that ritual.

I remember well the "taking pictures" part. It was a very long session, and everybody wants a piece of memory with the bride and groom. My own camera was also firing flash after flash capturing the splendour of that moment.
I find Indian wedding very very lively and colourful. Very interesting.

Should you guys decide to get married one day, consider experiencing this once a life time tradition. Its only one day of your lifetime to be king and queen and dressed up to the nines. Think about the fun/ partytime you're depriving your friends and family members if you decide to get married at the registrar.

Wedding is also one of those time when every family members from near and far make an effort to get together under one roof, even when uncle A and uncle B don't get along but during a wedding, the 2uncles of mine behaved in a respectable gentlemen way, seated face to face at the dining table and standing shoulder to shoulder for the family photos. Weddings are very positive matter in life, a good way to start a solid lifetime relationship, what more with so many good wishes and blessing from all those attending guest. At least that's what I think :)

Mukund said...

rae: This post was your idea... I hope I did ok... I agree Indian weddings are a happening event alright... I would definitely have a traditional wedding, Somehow without it things will not be complete :)

rae said...

You're doing great. Keep it up.

Kaddu said...

@ rae:
"Think about the fun/ partytime you're depriving your friends and family members if you decide to get married at the registrar."

Dude! It's easy for you to say so, 'coz you wouldn't have to be the one to suffer all that physical & mental torture in silence! In fact, not even just 'in silence', but, with a smile on your face... pretending you are enjoying it too! Not to mention the totally useless monetary expenditure on all that stuff! I mean the brides never ever use that lehenga again in their entire lives! Same with guys sherwani!

Shobhit said...

Very well said Mukund. In fact, this gives me thought for a probable future post to fill in with my views about the extravaganza.

By the way, the other day my friend had to manage a night-out at his friend's wedding. And the most interesting part according to him was 'widaai' which left everyone quite baffled, as the bride wasn't in the mood to cry. And her mom too who, in fact, tried to shove her off quickly...

That should have been some sight... hahaha

Mukund said...

rae: thanks :)

Kaddu: rae is a gal so dudet :)
I know its a big physical and mental torture but most of us I think do it for our parents and family cause they want to see things that way (especially parents)... Thats how they have pictured it and really do put in a lot of effort for it...

Mukund said...

Hey shobhit
Great to have you here. I rally liked your template, will definitely want to read more of you..
Hehe your friend must have had fun... finally some less saas bahu drama.. :)

puresunshine said...

hehehe! u shud sing that song whenever u see that guy!

Mukund said...

Puresunshine: I guess this comment is for the recent post of mine (the butt of all blokes)...
That guy is really well built, I would really think twice about that, he knew I was in the room... :)