How to make use of a Traffic Jam and What Google is missing

It rains for a day and the whole of Delhi Stops. Who so ever said time never stops should have come to Delhi on a rainy day. I had a similar opportunity yesterday and was stuck in a jam for 2 whole hours on a route which normally would take me around half an hour. But this jam was not bad, it was like sitting on a toilet seat, by the way who so ever said that the best ideas come to you in a bathroom was absolutely right. Anyways, back to the jam. I was able to compile a list of things that you can do in a jam:

Write/Think about a new Blog Post: This is actually something that I did, yes people the blog post you see is freshly baked out of a traffic jam. Since you are stuck anyways and have your laptop with you, just write a new post. No longer will you be able to complain about not having time to write, cause really in a jam the only thing you have in your hands is time.

Give the wheel to a novice driver: This might be the best way to teach someone how to drive plus you get to relax on the next seat. But seriously leave a new driver in Delhi's Traffic and he will come back enlightened, you cannot find a better teacher.

Break the rut: I am sure you all must be feeling really bored of listening to same abuses day and night. The people shouting MC and BC around you are just too many. So, just switch off the A.C. and roll down the windows and there you go. You will have a new set of abuses right there tailor made for you, by the people and for the people.

Think about what Google is Missing: A Google Search for my House. As I said being stuck in a traffic jam is like sitting on a toilet seat, you get the best ideas. So, here is my suggestion to google: Build a Search Engine which has the capabilities of telling me where my things are lying around the house, because as the clothes and the books pile up at every other corner of my room, it is seriously becoming difficult for me to find things.

Well even though the Jam continuous I think my stop has come. By the way it will take another half an hour for me to park... but that's a story we will keep for some other time...

Its Raining...

The first thing that comes to my mind whenever it’s raining is the famous Rain Man Problem in physics. Man it was so damn hard to find the relative velocity of the drops falling from the top when the man is walking in east or west direction. To make it worse they used to change the angle of the raindrops falling on the man and then made the man run. The result, well the faster you run the wetter you will be, then again you will be able to get to the shelter faster. That is only if you are looking for a shelter. If your soul purpose is to get wet you can run, walk or just stand, it doesn't matter.

It is only because of this problem that I try and run towards my car every time it rains :)

It’s fun to take a walk when it’s raining. People running around, trying to find a shelter to avoid the downpour, staring at you as if you were completely nuts. Those people don't really know what they are missing. I mean I know its acid rain and with the pollution and everything it just makes it worse, but then again it’s Rain. As kids you used to love getting drenched and make your mom run after you. Rains are always associated with fond memories (though mine is a little weird). Somehow it always brings a smile and a lousy physics problem that I might never be able to understand completely.

Speaking of physics, I will never understand why Newton (of the three laws of motion fame) thought of gravity only well the apple fell on his head. He would have discovered gravity long back if he had paid closer attention to the rain drops falling to the ground. Then again like common sense is not very common, things that are obvious are often overlooked.

Trying to be a Tube light

Really I don't understand why is an idea depicted by a bulb. I am just not able to understand. An idea can actually never be a bulb. Bulbs are just so normal. You switch them on and there they are giving a yellow creepy light, its so damn easy. Bulbs are convenient ideas. They cannot ever pass for a good idea. Its just not happening. 

An idea (I will put this one in capital and large fonts just to emphasize).....

SHOULD BE DEPICTED BY A TUBE LIGHT!!!

There, I said it, an idea should be depicted by a Tube Light. Here is the reason why...

A tube light like every other thing comes to life only after a struggle. You flicker, flicker and flicker and you adjust the starter and then there is light. No great idea and I mean no great idea is born just like that. Even Thomas Edison made a lot of attempts before inventing the bulb. Every idea is a part of a thought process in which the first time you fail, the second time you fail, the third time you fail but the fourth time there will be light. You will have an idea so good that the whole world will fall in love with it. 

Unfortunately we live in times where we want to become bulbs. Everyone wants to be a bulb to an extent that even a thought of becoming a tube light gives you the chills. You unfortunately don't realize, that no matter what, after the flickering a tube light still shines brighter than the bulb. Such is the fruit of struggle. Even the CFL (some of you I am sure must have thought about it) takes time to reach its peak.

So, all of you who have always tried, tried and tried to be a bulb and have still not reached there don't worry you are doing good. Struggle, think, flicker and adjust your starters... 

Be a Tube Light...

Merry Christmas....

Winters, sweaters, mufflers, skull caps, at some places snow and at others its still really hot...

But still none the less.....

Decorate the tree, wear red caps, have some rum cake and well drink some wine...

Vaguely remember the days when I used to go to school in shorts thinking why seniors should be allowed to wear pants. What was wrong with the school, making me wear a full length blazer and then shorts below, it's not that you feel cold on the top portion only.

Always used to think why so much chaos, it's just Christmas. I mean think about it no one used to let us burst crackers in Diwali but on 24th Dec a guy would dress up like Santa and distribute chocolates and we would run after him to have some more.

Now, imagine if it was your first Christmas and you haven't heard or even seen a picture of Santa ever and a guy with dressed in Red and white beard walks up to you.

The first reaction: Whats with the dressing dude. Get a pair of jeans.

The second reaction: Dude huge beards are out. Stubble is in.

The third reaction: Dude, where is the six pack.

The fourth reaction: Whats with the laugh and anyways it's ha ha ha not ho ho ho.

And now imagine the worst.... Santa takes this advice...

A shirtless, low waist jeans wearing Santa with two really hot happy helpers..... OMG!!!

Now not very warm is it... Hot yes but warm... Christmas would then become a very grown up thing... It would be adult-rated.

Being a kid I liked the guy in the red dress, the long beard and the paunch was just the cherry on top of the cake. Come to think of it somehow Santa will always remain the ultimate guy that I might want to be when I grow old. Think about it... He must be in his 70's (at least from the look of it), has an amazing paunch, spreads joy and still just keeps on laughing and to top it all has a private jet (in his case its different of course). I would kill to be that guy.

What can I say... still have that kid wearing the long blazer over really short shorts who keeps peeping out.

Merry Christmas all.... I hope you all were good boys and girls this year... :)