Two people are sitting in a room, the room is dimly lit and love is in the air. Romantic music is playing. The guy takes the girl's hand and the girl turns her head sideways as if trying to shy away. The guy slowly kisses the hand and the girl closing her eyes does not move a muscle. The guy is all over her and they both slowly move towards the bed.....
All of a sudden everything becomes blur and the scene directly shifts to the next morning when the hero and the heroine are covered up in bed sheets.... This implies that they had sex by the way...
Did I just mention the S word???.........
Other ways of showing the art of making love in bollywood would be...
*Two birds sitting on a branch with their heads together. It looks as if they are making out (if birds do that, I don't really know)
*Two flowers meet head on, again, as if making out (I am sure plants don't do it that way)
*The scene shifts to a fire place or any other prop in the room (don't really know why)
You might be thinking what the.... hey, shhhh!!! you are not allowed to say that but do go on...
What I am trying to say is that in India still at some level we make a huge deal about sex. We are trying really hard to open up but we are not comfortable accepting it. We do it obviously (look at our population) and we like doing it (again look at our population) but we do not want to talk about it and we do not like anyone else talking about it....
Lets get back to the theatre in which this movie was running....
The audience watching, some teenagers eagerly waiting for something to happen get disappointed. The others who came with their families grow red with embarrassment and have a deep desire of getting sucked into their respective seats by some form of gravitational force....
Ok, I have been thinking that this might get a bit controversial so I will put a disclaimer.... These are purely and completely my thoughts and are not meant to offend anyone. I do not want people to sue me and definitely don't want people to kick my a** or boycott me. If you don't like it please take it as lightly as you can. If you think this offends the values you were born with, I am sorry.... But do feel free to comment....
And ya all those guys who thought that this started really well and could have turned out into something better (if you know what I mean), sorry for the disappointment but you should have guessed better since an Indian is writing it....
Showing posts with label bollywood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bollywood. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
THE MOVIES WE WATCH....
Well in India we people are nuts about our movies and crazy about cricket.....
I am a big movie buff like every normal Indian, just that I don't feel that normal....
Ever seen a bollywood movie????.........
Two people drenched in rain are standing in front of each other, their names are R and S they both are furious and fuming with anger. Ready to fight they both dive at each other at the same time. Their fists strike the others face at the same time (in slow motion). R kicks S on the side. S flies up to 20 ft and falls on a table. He gets up (miraculously), holds R by his collar and drags him on a table on which glass bottles are strategically placed. R also gets up (Please remember this is not the Matrix and it really is air that they are breathing). They both grab the others collar and jump on their side through a glass window. They both have blood and glass all over their respective faces and are now lying down on the floor face first. They look up and in front of them is standing a man (lets call him V for villain) with moustache.......
All of a sudden there is a flash back in which this V has a pistol. He takes the first shot at R and then at S. This scene repeats itself at least 3-4 times.....
R and S both realize that they are brothers who were killed in their last birth and have reincarnated to destroy V. They both join their forces and just finish him off (there is a big fight of course). V gets away only to come back in the climax (obviously)......
They turn back in a very histrionic way and they see that on their sides are standing their respective girls, both the girls are giving a mischievous smirk to the heroes. The camera shifts from each of the Heroine's face to each of the Hero's face at least 5-6 times. Love is in the air. Music starts and all four of them at the same time go into a dream.........
The two heroes and the heroines with 20-30 similarly clad men and women, dancing away to glory on a colorful and lavish set, which makes quiet a spectacle..........
Still don't want to watch a bollywood movie.......
I am a big movie buff like every normal Indian, just that I don't feel that normal....
Ever seen a bollywood movie????.........
Two people drenched in rain are standing in front of each other, their names are R and S they both are furious and fuming with anger. Ready to fight they both dive at each other at the same time. Their fists strike the others face at the same time (in slow motion). R kicks S on the side. S flies up to 20 ft and falls on a table. He gets up (miraculously), holds R by his collar and drags him on a table on which glass bottles are strategically placed. R also gets up (Please remember this is not the Matrix and it really is air that they are breathing). They both grab the others collar and jump on their side through a glass window. They both have blood and glass all over their respective faces and are now lying down on the floor face first. They look up and in front of them is standing a man (lets call him V for villain) with moustache.......
All of a sudden there is a flash back in which this V has a pistol. He takes the first shot at R and then at S. This scene repeats itself at least 3-4 times.....
R and S both realize that they are brothers who were killed in their last birth and have reincarnated to destroy V. They both join their forces and just finish him off (there is a big fight of course). V gets away only to come back in the climax (obviously)......
They turn back in a very histrionic way and they see that on their sides are standing their respective girls, both the girls are giving a mischievous smirk to the heroes. The camera shifts from each of the Heroine's face to each of the Hero's face at least 5-6 times. Love is in the air. Music starts and all four of them at the same time go into a dream.........
The two heroes and the heroines with 20-30 similarly clad men and women, dancing away to glory on a colorful and lavish set, which makes quiet a spectacle..........
Still don't want to watch a bollywood movie.......
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